Thursday, March 26, 2009

Recently

I am sure that you all know recently I am not feeling good. In term of work, financial and love I really having a bad time. It all because of me... Haizz... This can be smooth if I have better plan and better action. I am not pushing the thing to be my way... I just urge thing can be solve quickly and smoothly...

A friend told be... do something that under your control than hoping something that not under your control to be happen... Sound very blur right? If you not understand, also nevermind... I getting very and very confuse with what I doing now...

Life is short... why not just enjoy it... why make thing so complicated? If I am dying tomorrow, how? I wishing everything will be fine, seriously... I hope everything can turn to be good and I can having my good sleep again... I wish you can be strong to face everything that might be happen soon... Good Night

*Praying hard

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Fair?

I am asking myself quite sometime, it is fair to me? Ermmmm I wouldnt say is fair not but I deserved this to be happen, I deserved what the consequences. As guys, mistake that done, we dare to admit and not to repeat it again.

There is nothing to be fair or not... Is not consider how many good thing is you do, is counting by how many bad thing u done. You can do 99 good thing but just 1 mistake... you gone... For example that my friend told me... 1 of the sales man... trying to push his company sales. Every year help company earn big buck... But in 2008 accidently he make one of the "big" customer angry. The customer immediately call to his boss and say "If this guys still in your company, I will end the business with you"... If you are boss... what you going to do... At the end... poor guy get fired at his ass...

Same in other thing... 1 thing you do badly... you death hahaha. So now, I learn not to make mistake rather than doing alot of good thing... =) I believe it applied to work wise, friendship, family or your relationship. Dont make mistake... you will regret forever...

Friday, March 20, 2009

Something that I really think hard

Hi all, miss my post ma? I am sorry for not blogging for sometime. Due to alot of issue that make me speechless and writeless =). Thing still mess up and I am on the track to solve and clear out unwanted issue to be happen.

Listening to someone advise yesterday and hit me hard to think. Do I still like this? Do I really can be better? Question that in my head now. Time will prove it, maybe, I am not so sure but as I know I will do all my best.

April is coming soon, what is happening to my plan... it been 4 months Im trying but yet no good result ... abit frus and sad... more to dissapointment but I know I need to work even hard to get what I want. I am not young anymore and I really need to do something that really benefit for my future... In term of love or career and family... all of them should be improve in this year...

To be improve... I think most important is Me, Myself... I should reorganize my thinking and my acting... I dont know how but I will try... try to be better... It friday again... Do I have any activities tonight? Or just sit home do nothing (of course not forget gaming and reading some books)...

I still waiting... waiting for unknown answer...

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Take a Break

Just want stop blogging for certain period for a break... Really no mood to writing anything right now. For those who are my fans, sorry for that.

Stay Tune... I will be back very soon.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Take Care

I don't know what to do now that we're apart, I just don't know how to live without the other half of my heart. I having serious heartache here... Its killing me. But dont worry, I still strong to handle this.

I have alot doubt on the decision that already been made. But I know, there must be a reason behind. A reason that I respect and understandable. I have no fear of apart, but my biggerst fear is that one day we will pass each other on the streets and have an artifical conversation. That scaring me...

I always questioning myself... What is different between a lover and a friend... it something very weird... Something I still not understand, A relationship :-

From a person you dont know until be a friend
From a friend until become a lover
From a lover it can also drop to be friend or
Someone just say HI when they meet up...

No matter how... I wish you have to forgive to forget, and forget, to feel again. Only that your life can be cheer up again. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely. From my bottom of my broken heart.

"Life is unpredictable, do treasure every moment"

Monday, March 09, 2009

Sleepless night

It nearly 4am... I am thinking hard why it happen again... It just so bad that it happen again and again. I swear to god that I really try my best to learn from previous mistake and hope it wont happen. In some circumtances... It still happen. I didnt blame anyone just myself.

It was so hard to build a relationship... but yet it so easy to destroy it. It take not even an hours just to destroy a wonderful story. A story should end with 365 pages is ended with only 5 pages. It was too sad when it came true, I still not believing it.

Nothing can be undone, what is done it already taken effect. It is too late to do anything but I just want to say "although is hard time, please be strong to go through it". I will here to support you spiritually. You are always the best among the rest.

The story of us just stop here... 09 March 2009 - Page 5

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Yes but no if, I just broke your heart just like that

Beautiful Sunday, For me and for you. A relief or I would call it release of feeling in our heart. At last, thing are happen and everything is too late. Too late for sorry and too late to recover. I still remember same month in 2007. I having this kind of feeling too, but as time pass and I been grown up, I think I can handle well this time.

It shouldnt even started in the 1st place because all this while, I am not ready yet. Why say so? I am not ready yet a better man. I am still the one emotion and uncontrollable person (scary huh). I dont want thing turn this way but maybe I still cant make it in the right way, my fault. Maybe I should take some break for myself. I should concentrate more on my career which currently really bad right now =)

Concern that disscuss is still confuse in my mind... I am selfish? Do I just think of myself? It make me confuse, I thought all the time I been thinking how to improved and hope to have a better relationship?... This was my mistake, and I not event know until today. Maybe I should really think about it... Think about what I been done all the time.

Thanks for the wonderful year you given to me. It was my happiest day in my life. Of course do remember to take care yourself and always happy.